soft as a walrus
sharp as an ihop rooftop
insert card to begin
authorizing do not remove card
remove nozzle to begin fueling
an unmarked spirit
cumbersome fantasy smoothie
mystic anthem sampling
productivity hax
my brain is scattered in thousands
in the morning of my life
the dying art of being human
wake up and take my mind for a walk
when i’m with you i feel like i’m cheating on myself.
a bouquet of faces
rancid spaniards spreading jesus
i pour salt on my friends to make them last longer
safety square
fire diamond
boutique screensaver screwdriver
to think that even when we turn away the sun doesn’t stop
meandering across our early 20s like chipmunks in pursuit
death and dissemination
each sentence a spell cast
time is the wind at your back
in an alien landscape
where leftie is tighty and righty is loosy
i’ll get around to it
you have a point there
working man’s yellow
and leotard blue
wifi router blinking like embers sunk in an ashy fireplace, the heat the home relies on.
riding like a bicycle afraid of its wheels
Marshall coils
"Do Not Remove Tag Under Penalty of Law" label
radiators always sound like they’re in pain
i’ll share my hotspot with you
limb whorls, and soil thawing from the bottom up
each year new rocks come up from the ground to the surface
as the frost thaws
rocks from deep down nowhere
making their way up to sun
endlessly
caught dry in the rain shaddow
gooder than it used to be
avaricious simpling
ten ton turbine
time crystals flailing
that moment you look out the window and catch a telephone wire against a sun-bleached wall and for a second it feels like you’re anywhere else other than where you are
the universal placehood of things gathered under sky
orion on fire
coiled dendrites
this mammalian unrest
one mammoth quaker
full bodied years
the least significant bit
Biking like a rogue pod racer
the drawer with the extra soy sauce packets
unwearable focus
hopping on a train of thought thinking it might take you somewhere good
but somehow you always end up back at the station where you got on
Playing chicken with our eyes
you got an innie or an outie?
and from down the block i couldn’t tell if it was a garbage truck or an ambulance
Whackalicious
and perhaps on my deathbed i will come to realize that living wasn’t worth all the trouble.
Seething meerkat.
1 2 skip a few 99 100.
Everything in the city ends up flat if you leave it there long enough.
In the fusty manifold
four orange wings and no body in sight
we swam in the oil spill gushing fluid like otters
i wish ill
Remains
Manufractured splinters
cootie shots
herd cootie immunity
That fruity nothing we call day
That angry biomass we call self
a thousand pounds of success won’t make the crickets any brighter
sunk deep in the quizzical ancient
i fall on
steely corners
shifting
Tennis ball
hits the dash
tennis ball
dangling
from the ceiling of
the garage.
Watching my thoughts like some bad B movie.
bought myself a funeral plot for my birthday
The monastic babble of a crackhouse at dawn.
something to take the edge off my life
something to take my mind of my mind
pushing like Reeboks toward the final light
memory’s vast temple
cup-and-ball
wrap myself in chain lights
and dance
dropped my fig leaf
Songs Without Love
Sunkist flat to the asphalt
People always think we’re related
Pulling water fowl from my head.
Sunscreen sweating into my mouth
Fat Fed ex hogging
Smell of crude oil and samosa
I had a dream I pan fried my hard drive
I broke it trying to fix it
A cereal goodness strikes again
the dropped blueberry
you just can’t find
watching the horror movie of my life unfold
I am a deep diver diving
i go deep deep diving inside my chest
and pull jewelry out of my shipwrecks
I am a spelunker of myself
I squeeze right through the
tightest parts of me
to meet the no eyed lizard beneath
he tells me there’s so much more to see
and scurries where I cannot reach
*album of songs each about one of the decrepit objects in the backyard. Make a video with each and then throw the object away.
Album called “the haves”
i’m full charge
you can take me anywhere
I take life’s lemonade and turn it back into lemons.
And I glue my omelette back into its shells.
tornado skies
“The universe began as an enormous breath held”
i don’t even want yesterday’s coffee anymore
Sun soaked and hellbent
I want to die young and
full of knowing
you’re the zipper you just can’t trust
worried you heard me sigh after i hung up
laces pulled through eyelets
not as tight as i want it
her name was Kelsi and she had great posture
for regular load fill to line
i am a light running on coffee
bathing in myself bathing in the world
the idea of mouth
and the expectation of Quaker Tuesdays
I want to be the kind of guy who walks up to the register and says “any pumps down today?”
old man screaming
his own name
you run for cover
i walk in place
pinwheeling
(as in mac curser freeze)
My eyesight is not what it used to be.
Song title that is just all the lyrics
footprint on the bathroom carpet
please forget the things i’ve said
It was a savory love
Everyday you love me like you know me.
i spend each morning looking at pictures of the moon
“circles surrounded by out-thrown rays of bright ejecta”
above the salt
the man from bog ville
like a broken pocky stick
i left water on the stove and by the time i remembered it was all gone.
My old bony heart
ill curry favor with the next best thing
quiet as the sun rising
The sneeze that no one hears
in liquid night
there’s no shade on a cloudy day.
like trying to turn the lamp on with a wet hand
ferrous slag
sometimes i feel like everyone around me is sad, is everyone around everyone sad?
gather all the trust fund babies you can find
make us do a good thing once and call it kind
some percentage of the time
trying my best
to fit in
and
fit out
flipping through Sky Mall
jounce flounce pounce
John Jacob Jingle-Heimer Schmitt
and the rattle of bleachers underfoot
immortal jellyfish
for real
“suspended animation”
factories of self
my heart was in it i just forgot to pump
everyone older is old
everyone younger is young
to listen instead to the twinkle in your heart
peddling hopes
you’ll never be sane if you don’t try
protests staged in my mind, demanding new leadership.
cells multiply inside me as i sing this
don’t fuck with me
in the mood to drop something and not pick it up
think of the thing that disturbs you most. now think of something else.
‘what is a snail’s fury’
i wake up like a lava lamp
pyroclastic flow
((songtitles all from old education video intertitle cards - as in “A creeping infant is usually able to climb inclines of moderate degrees”))
fish in a fishbowl
pinball brain
It’s the packaging.
in the fainting room
Manymanymanyfew
critical reception
every day spinning
the roulette wheel of thought
the washing machine of judgement
Fearing
always fearing
Consequences
How could such lawless compassion go unpunished.
All I want is a soft soft pretzel.
Embrace embarrass
And every morning when you remind yourself the story of your life do you put me in it?
I curl up in local minimums and hiss at passersby.
Gypsum board
Never worked a day in my goddam life.
Same old same old
Oil
Gas
Gold
Silver
Corn
Spent the morning losing online chess.
Rhinoplasty
Wanna die, can’t until my clothes are dry.
fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck
Rounding off the edges of myself for you.
Rounding off an unshakable world.
I want to flail myself winging into the winds of living, whole of heart.
It’s a nullity.
Meteorites filled with sugar.
Everything always
Everything always always always
nest egg
Feeling unplaceably bad again.
Globules of thought. Some taught emulsion of feeling and thought.
I want to be the kind of guy who makes meringue in the afternoon.
Somehow the road on the way there
Looks so different from the
Same one on the way back
I didn’t know the present until it past
Shower with my socks on
Wipe it up with your sock.
Pleasentville to centerton
Constantly forgetting something
You only like me when I cower.
Anyone who knows me knows I’m in two places every time I open my eyes.
alabaster plans wreaking havoc
Wholesale toasters
And a reckless king
Wants and wishlets
Am I dying?
Yes.
How long do I have?
We don’t know.
frenzy
in the fury panic of an injustice
I like the day over easy
my time a little burnt
my body a lantern
a woolen
fiasco
the woody bite at the bottom of the popsicle
I am growing a silence inside me, nurturing and loving it, watering it every day it into a harvest.
out here waiting for my past to change
to have
without taking
like a
powdered dream
a ruinous flirt/hurtyour dancingturns mecapsizeif you turn me up loud enough I’ll drown out what’s in your head
the
haunting
intelligence
of ocean the flower that chooses to growthe flower that refuses to growairglow
and at last you find it is impossible to
penetrate
the wall of other peoples’ feelings that are not youhow am i to stay afloat with such tsunamis of feeling and vast deadly oceans of consequence
The asphalt current rolling high
I peed on a dragonfly
It couldn’t fly after that
in the cradle of each others’
nothing
I do not know either hunger or fear, yet here I am feeling unsated and afraid
in concrete there is coral.
it was you who turned the sun off every night, and made sure I was warmly tucked in bed.
the clang
chatter
math of a brain in motion. an incessant nothing, back and back.Life’s strange familiar
worth its weight in water
It wreaks havok in daily shroudsLooking for more And moreof the nothingness that had gotten them so far
spent my afternoon
unsubscribing
from servesprefer to be “flashing participants,
multitudinous
” (from a display of mackerel)16rd2th7st4nd1nd2rd3th4st
the kind of fucker who doesn’t eat the crust.
Wind howl showing the light
underbelly
of leaflost all my savings betting on the weatherthought it would dry up but it got wetter
caught the momentripped it’s face off.
Be overcome.It will.
I killed a
bug
with myeyelid
.to look the rest of your life in the face
on layaway
she holds firm as a dyson swarm around me.
it passes.
a lowly renter of my own life, where the landlord’s a piece of shit.
lost all my savings betting on the weatherthought it would cool down but it got hot
cryingmouthful of PB+J
still chewing
sobbing over a half-eaten PB+J,
still chewing
some little fearful scrap of un-chewed past.
still in the long of my heart i know i want to be right more than I want to be good.
the milky alive of a humid day.
what we grew but did not cut down. what we planted but did not harvest.
impact winter
doorbells
and what to do whenyou’re/I’m the problem and the solutiona rote cadence without resolutionsomehow the dying and the bequeathed / the barrier and the releasea latched door and its only keydon’t you see I’m the problem and the solutionpure insurrection and the constitutionwhat it looks when the stinger got stung by the beeran off with the quitter then named appointee
walking with the pitch and carry of a good son
brought to heel
there’s a ghost in my head and it’s me
warm myself off in blanket statementscozy thoughtsand warm embraces
god’s brainstem
I will not be your knight in shining armorOr the bomb threat ill conceived
i felt your thoughts rub against mine, there from the other side of the couch
untold millions
“put a brand new body on a brand new nametighten her up and give it a name” -Dodge car commercial from the 60s
caught red faced in the caverns of a bloody past i never lived.
the world impaled.
cataracts of ambition
*a bunch of songs with the same exact title
King numbers.
We are the haves.
*wear a different nose every public appearance*
*end an album with an 8-bit monophonic rendition of “the entertainer”
Pieces of my head
flaking
.When your life’s really good thing is also the really bad thing.
Drier than ice
Under the Walgreens sign
Some ugly
infatuation
with the masses.crustaceans making haste, 4 to 5 times a day.
loneliness as nausea of the heart.
loneliness as without a reason.
the writhing specificity of you.
tender barrels of
heroine
oh me oh me oh mythe SS Eastland
and in these dainty gangways babethe hard hats all feel slicknow ripe to the brim with old wraps of flanneland palisades all in a din
the do-si-do of a four-way stop sign
“nothing I don’t have here, something is my specialty, anything is my offer.” twilight zone potion
deamon
the south shore slag https://goo.gl/maps/9PZ7fPGEzxrwAXUH6
points of contact of the soul
scotch tape
the total oblivion of which I am an integral part.
why is the night so damn different from the day?
in subtle absenceshope drawn close, warm as/like a
tabernacle
bumped my head on the equator, swollen for weeks
neither ready nor willing
burrowed in the salt cracks of the world
glow sticks in the
freezer
a patron facing chat
i put dinos on my face to keep the moisture in.
Killed a bug in my eye riding a bike.
CEO/worker pay ratio of Build a Bear Workshop
skeuomorph
The infinite drama of the universe banging.
The past is a wet thing. It tends to cling to you and stick, stinging.
Thoughtless as a mountain.
“
Pious hypocrisies
”died while living.
rocks sleeping.
Floundering anomalous/anonymous Managing another mans
apocalypse
Far off enough that I can’t tell if you’re walking toward or away. Salt flats in the still.
Wet socks.
Thoughts passing like billboards.
the useless trimmings of an occupied mind
Cappuccino utters milked on the counter.
like a lost scroll, a puppy in the rubble.
i found your sock in my duvet. like a lost scroll, a puppy in the rubble.
I’m gonna die with you on my mind.
pin the tail on the donkey.
in a world of ins and outs, waiting for the collapse.
“the birds that would sing and think it were not night”
the walkers forded the shallow burn and then came upon a field of gorse -dictionary example sentence for burn
Hopscotch
.Permafrost hopscotching.
Holding you like permafrost.
Clinging desperately to you—th.
watching each other brushing teeth.watching you watching me brush my teeth.
exhaust running out like pigtails.
the sandwich board read…
how to have a real thought in a world so full of notions.
lying on an air mattress while it inflates.
throw me off turvey.
check the expiration.
chewing the cud.
i cant concentrate.
The all mind. The web.
I ate the sticker.
the bag broke in the tea.
What a rude mutation, thought.
I bend my soul across a ragged hallow
sheath
The zipper stuck.
Reality apathy.
living in the world of the end dreaming of the end of the world.
caught in the exclusion zone.
lethally convulsive effort.
feed me the royal
jelly
“Concerning the book that is the body of the beloved, and the book of the resurrection of the body of the beloved which is the world.”
The silent roller coaster of dream.
Makin the worst of a good thing. Makin the best of the sads.
The scared and the sacred.
Fuck the crust, meet me in the mantle.
handle without a hinge.
constantly doing an impression of myself.
Pink as a war torn country.
polyvinyl chloride
prattling afterthoughts
captions off.
relativistic doppler effect - that something moving toward you is brighter and bluer than something moving away
lathered in the afterthoughtsof last night’s conversation
living crisp in the glorious almost
sunglint
quicksilver
soul hoving
got a lot of thoughts to copy and paste.
Sometimes looking at you is like looking at the abyss. Terrifying and sublime. of kat
Drinking yesterday’s coffee.
Somehow as new as the sun is old.
you bottle all your feelings upin stories about nothingcan’t you see I’mrealer than the motorcross
All I ever am is sober.
I wasn’t made for this.
detox
A mother’s
maximalism
.A treatise on the constitutionality of day.
class compliant
imagining what they’ll say in the PBS special about me when I’m dead
Two Sundays from now.
Damp feelings running down my leg. Sunshine dripping down your leg.
There’s nothing like nothing.
I put a cold compress on it.
Baby will you be my genetically modified organism?
Now that I’m old enough to have a past.
Why choose
mittens
when you’ve got gloves?a double edged
dream
where everyone else is just a worse version of
you
waiting there with youon the staircasebetween two platforms,for one of ourtrains to come.you’d go upor I’d go downand speed offdeep past the sight // beyond the brights // the other side.the staircasebetween those platformsunderneath 14this where I’ll make my home.I’ll curl upwith the Times and watch the shuffle/pistol feetpass by.I’ll buy akaraoke trackand sing Clapton to no one.and the
hurricanes
will funnel.then the trains stop the runningwhere the steel begins to crumbleand the people just stop coming.but I won’t move an inch therefrom that staircase betweenthe trackswhere I used to waitwith youbetween the L and Qfor one of twotrains to come.so if ever you decideto come back throughthe other sidewell I’ll be waiting therefor youon the staircasebetween two platformsfor one of our trainsto comeWaiting on the staircase between platforms. Me for the L, you the Q.
I’ll grow gills and swim far fuck away.Give me gillsGive me gillsSomeone forgot to give me gills.
I look best from 10 feet away.
Wet wood catching.
I am I am I amthis is this is this iswe are we are we are we are we are
put a
lampshade
on the sun“what did I do to deserve all this nothing?”
freshly ground innocence
TL;DR (too long; didn’t read)
Stand behind yellow lines
the wind howl of highways streaming
vieux riche
living in a museum of myself
living on reruns and apple juice
pluto we won’t forget you
constant constant thought thought.
I look through my spam for some kind of sign. a flicker of contact.
filaments of galexy
The rusted carol of a younglingLike fuck it baby I’ve been typecast
Fuck
finders keepers
.you were my place and timemy native landthe borders of the countrywhere I made myself a citizenI took place inside youa boat running through your oceanfated for the edge of the worldthe edge of the worldwhat’s there out therebeyond the edge of the whole damn worldnow I’m in a foreign country...
like blood from a rock.
Album title:
fuck fuck,fuck fuck,fuck
(With all of the “fucks” blurred out)Inflight entertainment.
running scripts
Ok I’ll be there in a few days I wanna was a good day I wanna was a good day I wanna was a good day I wanna was a good day
cause everything is fine until it isn’teverything is love until it doesn’teverything is words until it hurtseverything is motion til it stopseverything is little til it’s biggereverything is useless til you need iteverything is had unless you haven’teverything is bad until you sack it
and what the hell is this lump under my nipple?
“a summer dress without the body”
“watch bee vigilant to keepe your berth do windward”
dese demons of distrust run rife.
it’s future shock.
And now my socks are wet. I hate that.
Fuck you and your server farm I’m going home.
I don’t wanna be your little fuck up.
What do I do when my vulnerability is my protection?
nothing bad has ever happened to me.
like a falling stock.
Mutually assured
destruction
.times that the fly doesn’t move when you swat itand the branch doesn’t bend to your firemountain world spinning you O terrible holyit seems I can’t be youso I’ve come now to eat youliving out my little half life and half life and half life and halfradiating down to thetwigly writhing thinga broken spirit rackinglight bent pinch and crackinginto isotopes of foreverinto a hot dry fall rain
All the wasted life.
I'm just the best at showing you exactly why I'm not.
But the gum lost its flavor long ago.
dancing like the apostrophe dances above the “s”
all this pseudo life and
pseudo pseudo life
two lights on a broken highway start to get to know each other from across the street
the good thought that puts you to sleep but you cant remember come morning.
Thought loops and broken
trajectories
.all I know is I don’t want to be myself.
go die in an iceburg.
In the beautiful gigantic ugly.
Self-park.
Take your face off.
Oil drills bow sadly.
Trying to put on a fitted sheet by myself.
God made a woman, woman made a man, man made the devil, to throw her out the window.
Brain snacking on bullshit.
how should i know fullness if I’ve never known hunger?
part
cockapoo
.we will have built our own god. praying to rythms in the math.
At baggage claim.
Males that in animal mating rituals offer nuptial gifts that are parts of their own bodies to the females. And females that eat their mates after the act.
siren servers down the
roadhumming
holy beyond the fencePrepackaged invitation to my prepackaged young life.
Cooled rooms skating on glossy parallel lines.
I don’t wanna be some lesson learnedsome branches burned.
we pray now to commerce, we pray now to tech.
highway
hypnosis
.I'm starving.
Skating on the surface of myself.
Disease diseased and deceased.
Waving the flag as the ship goes down. There's nothing better than this, no there's nothing better than.
behold the aweful majesty of the universe.
death dialed and waiting.
confusion
rattling
Ostrich
on its back.I can only feel what I feel because I feel itI can only take what I take because I take itI can only want what I want because I want itI can only have what I have because I have itI can only do what I do because I do itI only am what I am because I am it now
skating on dream quakes.
it’s all what’s worth keeping and what’s worth throwing away.
jackoff to unboxing videos.
“
the lidless eye
”I’ve turned my back on the day.
The prime mover
I am hard and sometimes I feel like being water. I am water and sometimes I feel like being air.
Secure your own mask before helping others.
Real life is too confusing. I'll top my best candy crush.
A song entirely of ad lines.
I kept your shirtand that was thatI still wear it sometimes.
Music for Ads
don’t rely on me I’ll die on you.
"Life's an event and I've got the tickets" seatgeek
It's slipping from our fingers.
It was supposed to be different.
I hold like rocks to the backbone of myself.
In the spine.
Fuck
And in my spine.Packaged freedom
Movies are so much easier than living.Breakfast is so much easier than living.Staying home is so much easier than living.Masturbating is so much easier than talking.Talking is so much easier than having.Having is so much easier than knowing.Knowing has no place in being you or me.Looking in is so much easier than living.
To be loved by the beast.
I am a billion year old thing. I’ve been around a billion years.
Every day I don’t spend with you Kiah is a wasted day.
I really wish I could be everything you want me to be. And I wish I didn't feel bad about writing love songs.
Just tryna
apple s
the world.Stairs do the moving for me,Servers do the thinking.
I never think about Jesus
why is it so damn hard
dead letters (to no one)
hoarding the future one wrapper at a time
I
conjugate
my feelings in two iron tenses.I compare skins and keep walking. Smooth curved faces in shades. Long black lashes flitting white.There is no one like myself hereAnd no one who isn't.
It's becomes hard to feel time's passage without you.
I see it without seeing it, I hear it without hearing.
A bubble caught under the ice.
At dollar tree.
Constant family rehash and rehash rehash.
Cytochrome P450 1A2
Ordinary matter.
It's odd trying to be present in a moment so remote.
I'd kiss you but I've got a cold sore.
Free cash flows derive from the sum of operating cash flows plus interest paid.
today I feel different than all the other daysthe world is in one placeand I am in the world
we fill the world with sharp things and cry when we get cut.
I’m on hold.
There's a lot of sadness in these big houses.
Big houses filled with sadness.
Quiet dreams of scattered thoughts tumbling through an absent mind. I left those thoughts behind, well tried and tried and tried and tried. But never once felt how it lifts. Never once saw how the thicket rifts in timber fields and mine shafts, the kind that never last. I am nothing that is not there, and the nothing that is.
In a fury of laps.
If it weren't so hopeless I think we'da fucked on the chair.
as sure as earth, as rock, as steel.
But this is all someone else's idea of living.
Telephone poles lifting streams.
I am
me x me x me
and you areyou x you x you
.Owning the world one acre at a time.
Spending all my life running from myself.
tonguetie
I'll wear my tenderness like silk.
I just got back from a few minutes ago.
I want to see but my breath always fogs up the glass.
We heart our customers,and hate everyone else.
It’ll be better then.
I never wanted to be this.
With up to 40% realness.
Furby
.But this isn’t actually me singing, it’s just binary in the shape of my voice.
The ocean inside me.
I look at the mirror and check on my youth, forcing myself to see myself as attractive.
I don’t know what to do with you.
What to do with all this life?
I see snow capped trees in the screen, and they're so lovely.
Signs and
symptoms
.Doubts creeping.
Tryna make a dead man proud.
Stopping the microwave with one second left.
my mom is a slave to herself.
In fast forward.
We made this world.
bovine wrinkle stings
If it's art I don't need to wear it if it's clothing it should keep me warm.
big house, fountain armor, speed car runs fast as the day glows, me away from me, you down to you.
tell me I’m good tell me I’m good tell me I’m good enough.you you you’re good enough too.
ambition.
Put your mask on first before helping others.
Inert. Blue light. Bad parents.
Blue light.
Bad parents.
With flames approaching
LA
proper.it's data day to day.
The world is turning the grass is burning and the walls are learning to speak.
This was supposed to be fun. This was supposed to be so much fun.
Content warriors
.To hear rain when there is no rain.To see sky when I'm locked inside.I see bright flashes of raw attention and talking between strangers.
Howdy Doody
killed us.momhiding in some dark corner of yourselfdon’t you know that you’re real toodon’t you know that you feel too and it’s youthe way that others’ sadness makes you sadis the sadness I feel about youfixing things is hard, especially for things that need fixing themselvesgive up give up give upthe time is flying flowers dying asteroids falling through the sky andI’m right here, like youbecause of youit’s ancient this thingit falls through the cracks of familyinto the basement, covered in crudit’s a burn without a bandage,a break without its casta child that begs don’t leave meit begs it begs it begsdon’t leave meand lies there unattended while you shut the crib gate shut
Riding supermarket carts Mach 4/warp speed.
Pillsbury Dough Boy
There's no such thing as growing up, just getting old.
Only the chase.
No Stopping Anytime.No parking anytime.
Of course it always looks like
clouds are gathering at any horizon
.To not be surveilled/surveyed for one little second.
electric mist in my facemagnetic wind in my hair
Drops forming on the glass.
Shower drops gather in shapes on the mirror and crawl tentatively down. How the fine mist is really a million little drops.
Finger dragging fog into thought drops.
an architectural blueprint: a bridge above the precipice in the high mountain - Alexander Brodsky
Life on the crust. Faces on the surface.
Steel critters wheeling/
crawling
.I don't wanna be another tragic story.
It's just redshift. A love that comes from speeding away from you. Here and there, here and there we are.
Tooth brushes spooning in the glass
.And on that night walk the world was so brittle. After I parked I knew the world was brittle.
The metal stampede.
We make daylight with two brights.
Obsessed with the ways my life could have been different.
Of course now and then I hate myself.
"It is late; it is a late time to be alive."
The moire patterns that become of us.
Creaky knees
.Hunched crooked on the subway platform. 5 cent bottles spilling.
It’s this new sameness every time.
Time folded over itself, lined up at the seams.
lyrics to the westminster chimes melody/inscribed on Big Ben:all through this hourlord be my guidethat by my power no foot shall slide
The crust of the earth.
I am nobody to somebody
.I/We wish for sleep.
Mass hypnosis of the third degree.
It takes longer to dry than get wet.
Feet dangling from high Copenhagen string lines, spinning, whirling away with you.
Eying pastries through the window, spending like I know to.
Drafting emails in my head
sky fleets streaking
trying to forget the names of colors, looking.
moneyback guaranteed
I talk along great distances,I sit high at great heights,I watch two suns approach me on a
crystal
laneand die in the collision on site.I spend my days folding words on electric fences. Numbers in long lines spelling hello and goodbye, earning me somehow a place with a view. all I want is a place with a view. that’s what they all say. but in order for there to be an up to look from of course there must to be a down.
Buying memories by the pound/foot.
squall
.moods
.File sizes and blink lights.
I never open my eyes and see nothing.I never open my mouth and feel hungry.I’m
deprived
ofdeprivation
and I’m out here accepting donations.Burry your feelings in thoughts,burry your thoughts in paperwork, get a good job doing bad thingsat a registered LLC.
Mourning the death of the discreet entity that was us both together.
I see pictures of children in far away places.
How when you yawn and talk at the same time you sound like a fat monster.
She said I don't want to cry anymore, but I couldn't help it. It was crying for the existence of things. It was crying for the existence of the end of things. It was crying for the passage of time, for our being here on this planet of all creatures of all places of all times somehow us two get to bask in all our together. It was crying of living being the same as dying and loving the same as letting go, only slower.
To love each other enough that we no longer need each other, to love myself enough that I no longer need me too.
Sending emails to myself.
Unsubscribe and unfollow, I dare me to.
Woebegone, woebegotten.
Sleeping with a Martha Stewart everyday™.
I'm not my statistics no but yes I am the man behind the screen. The Hifi groan of your metal animal coming to life. Rubber throats throbbing like mine is, left and right of your head. Begging to be loved. Or at least YES acknowledged.
setting minimum bird ingestion standards (for jet engines)
Algae bloom.
A sacred place to do unholy things.
Take a second to see the eternity in front of me.
Like ivy we grow where there is room for us.
Denouement.
We stopped at Best Buy and I secretly liked it.
Cicadas that never stop but you don't hear.
I am your branded content.
Better sorry than safe.
Postmaster general.
“neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds.” (album titele?)
Scratching my brain bloody in confusion.
Watch my screen; it knows where to go.
Pyramid schemes of self.
And we all said the things the people we talked about were afraid we'd say.So I thought they must have said the things I was always afraid they would.
wiggle
promise sweetlyAnd all is not well with is.
We fall out in a naked shiver blastBut make it up in long drives and throw nightsI never saw what you saw comingI couldn't believe what I couldn't see
Bottled glimpses of what it must have been.
Watching the dream lines underneath my eyes.
I don't want to give up on the world just yet. One more chance comon one more chance make it.
I should have been famous by now.
Dead bug
on the dashboard.And all there is is packaging.
Eating culled corn bomb fresh.
A small true thing.
Reach nirvana with 3 easy payments of $19.95.
Shuttled in pods.
we are the ice cream children.
taxidermy books.
Create side swatch label for stacked pad.
I want to kill things with my bare hands.
I try to make the better worse, but it seems you always get there first.
Copy paste.
All is lost all is lost yada yada yada.
With you I feel ok about the passing of time.
Zip lock.
Gilgamesh
.Civil twilight.
A recluse and a loose wreck.
she's given up on living
All of us human excess.
Let's be real, we all kind of want the plane to go down.
Looking for pictures of Elaine Benice naked.
Maybe I'll go off into the hinterland nowhere and dig myself a grave I can believe in/build myself a life I can sink
teeth
in.Hold a moment in a sound.
Trading stocks son and daughter smiling on your desktop.
Time's carcass."man is nothing; he is at most times
carcass
"Airplanes parked symmetric like splayed Rockettes.
An iPad for every face.
My brain fires hot lightning in the
wet sun
.Calculations, transmissions, waves and
radiation
all around. These are the codes that open the passing, lines of you may, indescribable cryptic that no one knows. The gestalt.Hold me like a balloon on a string.
I am what the sad man dreams he’ll one day be.
Piles of stuff piled for us.
We
<3
our customers.We<3
them good.Hard hat required.
I had to look in the glossary.
Glass feet melting sheen.
I realized I had everything to talk about with certain eyes.
Im alright if she's alright.
It's a
clusterfuck
I'll tell you that.Rolling through the subway car a guy without a leg shakes a cup. His wheel bumps my foot on my way out but I'm not mad.
Love bunnies that roast in the LA sun.
I guess we should be training for the thunder days.
There was so much hope but there’s not that now.Fred Astair dancesGene Krupa jives.We walk silly on botched pavement waiting.
Ca2+
in my mouth.And finally when robots do everything better, we’ll know better is not what we wanted.
fructose
.I want to make music for many before the world dies again.
Small R’s in circles next to words for things.
Good looking guys and good looking girls fucking good
looking
guys and goodlooking
girls.Phytoplankton
Buy it before you try it.
trying to figure out the surface areaof two mouths laughingdreamin up the soundof one small hand clapping
This is [the summer of] my life, if I can believe it.
Boo boo bear and Ranger Smith.
I remember my birth like it was yesterday.
All you can find on the subway tracks:A sock a washcloth still white a cork for an opened bottle, foil, a D battery, a charred and splintered plastic spoon - someone ate something from that spoon, talked to someone at that party, maybe found out later that week that his father got 2 tickets to the Lakers game but gave the other one to his other son, and got jealous, and took it out on a roommate he
clandestinely
likes - piles of rocks from another world dripped between evenly spaced boards. They space so evenly those boards. Maybe they are from the same tree, and are happy to be spending their industrial lives next to each other, among discretely sectioned friends.something about a subway
homemade signs about lost dogs and cats.
Behold the god sauce, rain.
I’m a
pinball
on the world. But who’s scoring points?ancient sky.
counting seconds downlistening for the thunder crackwondering how far we arewaiting for my pants to dry
try less.
working like the snow plow before the parade.
sending
postcards to nowhere
I sang you that pretty song and we cried and stuff.
Seeing myself see myself.
I dream in public.
How dare you deprive me of my
suffering
.Im nothing but what you want me to be.
No longer in the morning of my life.
She died of comfort.
I can see you now in
formaldehyde
follow you my suit.
alone, I wanted to become no one.
Cosmic heaving.
A place away from places.
Sit when you're moving and move when you're staying put. A train and a treadmill all twisted confused.
Fresh squeezed.
Iconoclast.
Think the matter raw.
Undone laces
flapping
.I don't want to be your casualty.
What's the wind worth (to you)?
with you on a swing set
Sitting with you on a swing set would mean so much more than the blessing
Without
isms
orists
."The godlike touch of fingertip billions."
as sure as the color of my window
"I'm someone who's supposed to be me."
Godify
The sky is falling.
watching a video of my own funeral
Because I am the appendage of a doctrine.
Permafrost
on the windshield.I'm not here.
But what's the difference between dying and living really? Does it take any longer?When the folks in the brier can't hear you, you can know that the apples are safe.
When you've forgotten what the world is for.
Stepping over (
velvet
) ropes.forgive me for my screenly life for my solid state mind
Sam I am.
catalogues
Weathering signs of
infinity
.Polyphyte
I'm unmoney.
The truth is a drag.
Shrapnels of truth.
I see this with eyes as wide as years.
You don’t let me be weak enough to know me.
"some vast vast final dinosaur"
It's like lighting a fire on fire.
I’ll go down dripping.
This ship is going down.
smack dab in the middle of my soul.
Can't seem to brake without breaking the tail lights.
The city tremblesThe city is trembling
Hide behind that suit and tie. Throttle on the wheel good bye.
Concreve rocket
.Your suicide crosshairs realign.
A poster child with no escape.Can't you forget yourself one last time?Reading greeting cardsHoping for the words to come.Listening to Vince Guraldi thinking of the worst to come. (some water please.)
I will face you down.
I want you face down.
All before no after.
Like getting a
scorpion
to care.Pushback lovers on a plane to nowhere.
I haven't been wrong in a long time.
.................
I can do better than you at most things even if not the thing you're talking about specifically.
Now crocs nestle in the furrows of my gratitude.
Someone’s going to get the/ir face tonight.
You can’t afford that
eagle
child.The dancer with cancer clicked a heel.
My shitty reception hurt like a paper cut.
The smarter salesman took my things and left.
I’ll bag your items if you leave a tip.
I’d like some fucking
napkins
with that.Deeply enveloped in the
cradle
of your cancer.he died righteous and alone and told us not to pick flowers for his funeral
His warranty expired before his spine collapsed.
Tender
my give ups in back slaps.I
shit
younot
.The way you touch me is not incomparable to that ride we went on in Epcot.
The cross section of our histories cowers under the promise of this horny scalpel.
These corner stores rob you of your impotence.
I simply did not ask for this holy matrimony.
I'm plotting I'm rotting I'm dodging I'm dazing.
Hold on to your faults heathens,It won’t be long before the curvies turn to lines.Fault lies in lanterns, not canters,not eyes,but don’t crowd me, your thighs are enoughfor a bitter fucked socketdrawn into quarters and dies/twos.
I don't have too much to cry about.
Pull my
yoke
you dirty chairman.Wet words.
Your wet words don't faze me.
Your leather mind can't comfort me.
Where are the [fucking] questions, never mind the answers.
I forgive you and the anvil you
snagged
,on your way up from the harbor and back.If you knew that I knew what I/you lacked.You'd/I'd be unbidden.Loves so meanly.
I need someone badly to not need.
Cases of fingerprints.
Cause the walls are too white and the stove light's too bright for me.The locks are too tight,And the fruit doesn't come with seeds./this fruit doesn’t grow without seeds
Breathe me breath the breath breathing best believe we leavingLet the rest believe we relievingbet the rest relieved the wreath wheeling pop a breast to feed to tween teething under weaned I see treason, under greens I see seasons, under heat I read lesions, blundering bleed the eat
heathens
, even,breathin
, breathe me breath the breathbelieving
ween we been beaming breath-e
I don’t have any reason to come clean to you.
Pass through me.
Withing
with
you.Writhing
with
you.I'd like to immerse myself in goop, once someone makes breatheable
goop
.In our crevices there is goodness.
Goodness still lingers deep in these (worn)
crevices
.You stripped me of my sibilance.
Stop hoping at me.
I'm making the most of my old lies inside and out.
I’ll show you my moments for a quarter.
Violet size.
Are you cured of me?
Take me out out and away. Scatter me far and wide. I don't want this whole
me-ness
insideme
. I don't want such a me at all.How do I die well?
Normal egress, saturated inquest.
Die me well.
Fumigate
me my darling.These are the ways the world is spelled out.
I state the following.
I want parts of you. Not the whole thing, but some of you.
Can I dip my toes in you?
I want
contact
.contract
mecontact
.I turn to you in loving desperation.
I'm
guilty
I'mguilty
I'mguilty
I'mguilty
I'mguilty
.I want to love you
humans
. I want to love you most. Please let me love loving you you youhumans
.I don’t want to get old. Don’t make me, make me get old.
The whyness of it.
Here in my iddy biddy crevice of the world, things are ok.
To winnow or cull the nights and sizes.
Products bred by
broken promises
.This world means the world to me.
Let me feel your gradient.
Something's not right.
I haven't died yet. No
starling
I haven't died yet.I'm small but I'm big. I'm small but I'm big enough.
Wading through bodies and heads.Wading through your wants and beds.
I don't want to say anything.
Nothing more.
I'll be your cancer.
I
throb
.I'm just big enough to know when I am small.
Eyes that close and open instead of blink.
Puddles of confused gratitude.
I can feel both.
I'll
huff
and I'llpuff
.Forgive my screenly life.
Let it out. Let it out. Let it out. Let it out. You are out. You're about. You are out. Let you out.
It's a broken tautology when you strip it all down.
Always
blaming/ascribing/pinning
one's reason for existing on something that doesn't exist.Is it just me or is the world getting smaller?
I miss all the people I'll never know.
Peaking out from under the covers of peopledom.
Hide out in
flattery
, there's no where else to go.Why strip my words of their meaning when all I’m trying to say is that I didn’t really mean it?
Boy I’m just big enough to move the world the tiny little bit it moves
proportional
to my size when I walk it.I'll pay you for your money.
I want to show you my best self. But then I guess you wouldn't have anything to compare it to.
I don't mean to half mast you.
I can't tell if I'm
timid
orheartless
.All you are is older.
Give me your man shower, I'll take no relief.
The clarity with which I do not need it.
In dimples of time, I wimple and die.
Sometimes
I’m scared of the future.Sometimes
I feel like it will eat me.Sometimes
I feel like I’m in it alone.Sometimes
I feel that the responsibility is mine to take for the uncertain existence of the certainly confused human soul, thewrithing
and the quick of the lucky third planet.The
writhing
and quick of the lucky third planet.You’re monstrous. Go die and I hate you. Oh fuck wait god no.
why do I feel like a semicircle,where I need only one more of me,or a you with your spokes bare and singingand we’ll roll ourselves right out of town
Can you feel my evergreen stare?
Feeling the painful ping of the
metal world
.It's always a verses.
Out here putting place cards on tables.
I am a constant person. I ought to be a constant. Constantly personing.
You grieve the world with the simplicity of two rocks falling.
Fear I won't be hard when you touch,Fear I won't cry at the funeral,Fear I won't cry when you touch me,Fear I won't be hard at the funeral.
There is life at the tip of my tongue if only I'd saliva to get it to sound.
There is life at the tip of my tongue if only I had spit enough for it to sound.
I've got orchards in my head so pick me pick me pick me pick me.
It's a quark contest.
I dream of breaking things.
The scrum of the youth.
Your
sybaritic
charm.It's a good day here whether I like it or not.My head is brown with envy.My teeth are green with doubt.
now becomes then too soon.
Stolidly
my own.I'm thirsty, dammit, I'm thirsty.
My bit reduced concept of freedom.My bit reduced thoughts about fear.My bit reduced inkling of you.
I'm ready to be something I'm not.
Unfarmed miles ofunformed smiles
Unfarmed
smilesThere's always a little bit left.
I am the ghost in the machine.I am what makes it go.
Shifting my focus from table to chair (and back).
I don't know what I'm after but I'll tell you what came before.
A doe eyed potty mouth.
And if once I had your ear (
sweet death
) what nothings would I whisper?Holding every hand you could reach.
We are for nought.
In darkness these reindeer see power lines giving light.
Fashionably disillusioned.
All of this flying with no place to land.
Some loose
primal
piece of myself.Soggy intentions
.Far.
It's far.
I want to be a kid again.
Sex has kept me current.
I just realized that fountains used to be for drinking.
This
molten
scenery.Swimming with a cold blooded mind.
Caves. Wet backs.
I remember the future.
Nobody beautiful ever
hurries
.It started to pain outside so I went back in. I shut the window and stared.
I'm just as much a kid, just now closer to dying. I'm just a dying little kid.
There's a universe in here.
Where did I see myself in 10 years?
All
wax
without thewick
.and is that all
This is no place for charm songs.
We are the gods I am a god already and I am ready for no not hang on ready.
It's like trying to put out a fire by yelling at it.
This
fucked
brutal nowness.Because baby I
fuck
with my phone off. (on?)Why does it feel like my life hasn't started? And yet here it is ending second by second.
Existence is an itch death doth scratch.
All I’ve been trying to do is convince/show you that what’s wrong is all right.
Bored and unimaginitive, you make me want to die young and full of hope.
A tape left playing with no one there listening.
I am no bigger than my fears.
These chocolate
faces/spaces
.and is that all yes that is all (why do you ask)
I'll push the day outside and rope your questions in with my answers.
You and your
brutal unyouth
.I thought it was you in the kitchen but I guess I just left the light on.
To feel forgotten.
There there, there's nothing to save.
A man in his wholeness wholely attending.
The moment was
ripe
.Pharmacological
smile.I watched you know me.
This is the geometry of suffering.
Slippery
world.I just want to blow the thing up, shit.
Hold on tight.
Please, stop it all stop it all stop it all stop it all stop it all stop it all stop it all.
This fucked fate is over now.
This face is hardly worth wearing.
I just need a place where there is night.
I am filled with shapes.
Don't bother.
But I want to make it right. I want to make it right again.
Loam
siltLoam
sandyloam
silty loam silt.If you were me I wouldn’t like you.
I understand the meaning behind the words, you just understand the words.
And I am obsolete now.
One unplanned planet after another.
Restricted
hazmats
.It's all we've ever known.
Let's be demented together.
And only those of us who remember to remember will go.
All we do is argue in my head.There's no use now / there’s no turning back now.It's a rock buried in a homestead. (i think that’s about mom and dad...^)
For all that I want to, I can't deny that my life is my life.
Crescent life
.Somehow I still thought it would end up ok. It didn’t.
Hoisting delusions day in and day out. (how am I supposed to have time for anything else?)
I'd say my heart beats for us but I can't hear it over the hum of the refrigerator.
Now even I don't need me.
Folk hope
.We had a good world and we couldn’t keep it.
I’ll fill my mind with poetry and live there til I die.
"waiting/in a life full of little stories/for a death to come"
And I never thought it would come to this. Eating
bean broth
from a paper plate.How many lives will this lesson cost?
King of the hill, top of the rotting heap.
These
baroque
pleasures.All
outsidesno
inside.I try to imagine who they were as a kid.
Wide is the berth of the cold moonSoft is the mouth on warm spoonOrange is the country that I know bestI'll tell you I love you and forget all the rest.
ashcan rantingssuccessively
unsuccessfully
-ginsbergAnd I remembered my hands could write more than type.
We are/eat the night whole.
I can't find my USB.
But it's so hard to abandon the self that I've made me.
To think that everything has a come from and a going.
I am become...
I am become death.
Unearned death.
Fixtures on a goodbye limit.
Slave to my life.
Brittle
.Born on the fulcrum of the planet.
Digital slime
.Make me your admin.
To see the sky with her pants down.
Now all we are is contour, dripping with
stingless
cause.I’m on the edge of my seat.
Beyond and above.
All money nothing to buy.
I want to be real.
Peptide regal mouth
.I step into the belly of this machine and it takes me where I want to go.
waiting in a life full of little stories for a death to come
I spend all day being
jealous of myself
."Grace Thomas thought that Temperance Lloyd was responsible for her illness, because the previous September, Lloyd had wept with joy and expressed pleasure in seeing that Thomas had regained her health.” Lloyd was hung two weeks later with two other supposed
witches
.Impossible trinity/
unholy trinity
/infernal names"Consume my heart away; sick with desireAnd fastened to a dying animalIt knows not what it is; and gather meInto the artifice of eternity.…to sing of what is past, or passing, or to come.”
I thought you would be fun to have fun with.
I’ve got my mouse on the
cursor
and I’m ready to click.A rent in the fabric of my soul.
I'm bad at finding things but good at looking.
I'll see you in the
Ganges
.I hold a saber between my legs. If you don't
sheath
it someone will hurt.Haven’t you been seeing me fold into the never never?
We make tubes.
It's not that I haven't the will to live, it's just that I haven't the will to live here.
I haven’t the will to live or to leave.
The blood don't know that it's flowing, the oxygen don't know where it's going.
If I put my soul on a plate would you eat me or throw me away?
I hold the night to you.
Pustules
of self called man.We haven’t much time. Let’s go.
to nurse your hurt.
hard to bite the hand that feeds me.
A mom in regression.
Charming, cheerful,
condescension
.I have seen it but I cannot say what it looks like.
Fervor burst
.Nothing’s ever stopping you and no one ever wins.
It was a moment worth itself.
Soon I’ll have my eyes published